As we watch all the previous films to prep for "The Force Awakens" in December, we watched the worst Star Wars film, ATTACK OF THE CLONES.
Like all of the second trilogy, George Lucas balances great moments of action sequences with long sequences of gibberish filled exposition, but this time he compounds the problem by writing flirty, romantic dialogue between Annikin Skywalker and Padme.
It's been ten years since the events of Episode I and in a strong bid for consistency, Writer/Director George Lucas replaces one horrible actor in the role of Annikin with another, with Hayden Christensen taking over the part and delivering every line with the same flat touch.
Poor Natalie Portman struggles as well, but in all fairness, she is playing off a block of wood.
Dialogue has always been Lucas's weak point, but its never been more apparent than in the words he tries to give young lovers here. No humans falling in love have ever talked like this, robots maybe, humans, no.
Ewan McGregor is terrific as Obi Wan, who is forced to trust Ani to guard Padme when he is sent to track down the assassin who has tried to kill her.
He soon discovers a separatist plot within the Republic to create a massive clone army that will outgun and overpower the good forces of the Republic and their Jedi Knights.
There are GREAT sequences in the film, including the attempted assassination scene and subsequent chase, Obi Wan's fight with Jango Fett and the finale arena battle.
Anytime Yoda is on screen he steals the show and in 2002 when this was released, CGI effects enabled the filmmakers to go fully digital on Yoda and cut him loose for the first time. His light saber duel at the conclusion is the best part of the film.
This is the "middle episode" of the second trilogy. But consider just how GREAT the middle episode of the first trilogy was. "The Empire Strikes Back" is the best film in the entire series and one of the best sci-fi films of all time.
"Clones" is by far the worst film of the entire series.
It's likely because you truly cared in "Empire" about each of the characters and their fate. Here, your lead actor is a whiny, moody, disrespectful teen. Granted the guy is going to become Darth Vader, but a better writer would have found ways to make that transition believable, instead of making Annikin's slip to the dark side seem like a murderous temper tantrum.
Hey, the good news is that Jar Jar is only in the movie for about 3 minutes and there is plenty of visual spectacle to nudge things along to the best film of the second trilogy, Revenge of the Sith, which would come out three years later.
John Williams music score is terrific too.
See, I found a couple nice things to say about CLONES, by far the worst film in the entire series.
Every successful film series has its weakest link. For OO7, its "Moonraker" for Star Wars, it's "Clones".
We'll give this a C and move on to the better films.....