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Holmes and Watson

Every once in awhile, a movie comes along that's so bad, such a box office bomb, so universally shunned that you have to see it to understand why.

After sitting through the 90 minute mega-turd HOLMES & WATSON, the reason why is simple. There isn't one laugh in the film.

Not one.

I enjoy Will Ferrell and John C Reilly immensely together. "Step Brothers" is an all-time fave. But what in the holy hell happened here?

The movie is a "comedic" take on Sherlock and Dr. Watson from their early days, through their partnership and one major case against their nemesis Moriarty (Ralph Fiennes, completely wasted).

Set up after set up comes along, but not one single punch line lands. Every major gag was done 1000 times better in "The Naked Gun" films decades ago.

Scenes involving Queen Victoria (Pam Ferris) inch up toward a laugh, but stumble and fall.

Writer Etan Cohen has delivered some funny films in the past including "Idiocracy" and "Tropic Thunder" but this is a mess.

You know that feeling you get the last half hour of Saturday Night Live when you watch the cast burn through lame skits that weren't good enough for the first hour? They are comic masterpieces compared to this lifeless crap.

Ferrell and Reilly are stranded in the material, throwing themselves at every line in a desperate attempt to breathe life into a DOA script.

After disastrous test screenings, the studio tried to sell the film to Netflix, who promptly refused.

Oh wait, there is ONE mild smile in the film, featuring an actor from "Titanic" making a cameo to tie in with that film. When your best laugh references a film more than two decades old, I think desperation is the word of the day.

Why did this bomb, HOLMES & WATSON?

Elementary. It's one of the least humorous comedies ever made.

It earns an F, as in WTF were they thinking....

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